tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36762822011-04-22T09:16:44.145+10:00John Howard: Prime MinisterJohnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comBlogger881100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-49380853958209788702007-12-05T21:17:00.000+10:002007-12-05T22:56:27.790+10:00WhatEVER, Australia. Are you all retarded? I was the best PM eva! I did so much awesome stuff for this country, like pretty much single-handedly keeping the economy strong with Workchoices and keeping dirty foreigners out and stuff. Not to mention the power walking! Eleven years of power walking! 4015 days! With just one hour of strutting my hot prime ministerial body around every one of those Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-302420086755146342007-08-15T21:13:00.000+10:002007-08-15T22:45:11.627+10:00Ooooh, that Peter is such a nasty pastie! A few years ago, he told these journalists (of all people! Ew!) that he wanted to get rid of me! And I asked him if it was true, and he was like, "Nah, John, we're totally best mates... oh yeah, actually I did say that... BUT I DIDN'T MEAN IT!" But I think he DID mean it, and now I'm scared that he's plotting and sabotaging behind my back. Like, he's the Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-44195349739832369532007-07-13T20:50:00.000+10:002007-07-13T22:31:11.034+10:00Man, what a crappy week!First, people got pissy 'cause I forgot some Tasmanian chick's name. She was a Liberal candidate or something. But do you know how many Liberal candidates there are in Australia? I'd say at least a dozen — maybe more! I have enough trouble remembering the names of the front bench, let alone a sheila from some island. That's why the speaker in parliament just calls people Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-78131786668771090482007-07-06T18:21:00.000+10:002007-07-06T18:22:29.564+10:00So I’m back. When I stopped writing this diary, things were going so well, ‘cause fat old Kim was such a fat loser and everyone loved me because I go jogging and am fit and stuff and everyone had jobs and were digging the war in Iraq. But now, that geek Kevin Rudd is more popular than me and I can’t work out why! I mean, I have glasses, I have a big moon face, I’m short, I wear natty suits and Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-1125993782543901692005-09-06T15:56:00.000+10:002005-09-06T18:09:28.600+10:00Pfft, I wish the PC crowd would just lighten up. Firstly, Johnny Brogden makes a hilarious joke about stupid Bob Carr's foreign wife by calling her a "mail order bride" - which is FUNNY, because she's FROM ANOTHER COUNTRY and also because Bob Carr is ugly and would probably have to pay a woman to go near him - then people get all offended by it, so he had to quit and then, because a life without Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-1115121626539141172005-05-03T21:05:00.000+10:002005-05-28T15:49:30.463+10:00Now, I'm no dope-smoking, hippy greenie, but the Japanese want to kill a bunch of whales, and I'm not cool with that. Not 'cause I really care if they die or anything, but actual dope-smoking, hippy greenie whale-watchers bring in a fair bit of tourist dollars, and I do care about that. Still, I hate agreeing with Bob Brown on anything, and I made sure he knew this didn't mean that we were Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-1113495333735178372005-04-15T00:55:00.000+10:002005-04-15T02:36:57.860+10:00So before the last election, we told poor people that if they spent heaps on medical bills, we'd pay heaps of it back, and I swear that we actually had every intention of doing that until we found out that it costs money to pay back someone's bills! Tony and I were totally shocked when Pete came in and told us that poor people were actually using this "safety net" thingo and that WE were paying Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-1111844543615334752005-03-26T22:39:00.000+10:002005-03-26T23:44:48.710+10:00Wow, it's been a while since I've written anything here. Sometimes I just get so caught up in the fun and excitement of Australian politics that I just forget, though.And Parliament has just been chockers with excitement lately. Like Tony Abbott found his long-lost son and then found out it wasn't even his son at all! What a relief, though. Like, imagine wondering about your son for 27 years, Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-1106208541273385482005-01-20T15:40:00.000+10:002005-01-20T18:09:01.273+10:00Ahahahaha! So the Australian Loser Party are even bigger losers than they used to be. They lost the election, they always lose at footy at lunchtime (well almost always. Sometimes it's just members of the NSW right, and they play dirty), and now they've lost Latham. So I guess it's back to old Fatty McFatfat. But I dunno if it's a good or a bad thing, really. On the one hand, I won't have Mark Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-1101798219261651532004-11-30T13:50:00.000+10:002004-11-30T17:03:39.260+10:00Just got back from APEC. This year it was in this place called Chilly which is in this country called South America, except it's nothing like Real America, 'cause it's full of poor foreign people. Like Centrelink. At APEC meetings, they always make us wear some lame costume and then they take this class photo of us all. Janette always insists on doing my comb-over in the morning and stands behindJohnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-1100002108818502172004-11-09T18:07:00.000+10:002004-11-10T09:30:16.906+10:00Hooray, George is back! I mean, I guess I knew no one in America was gonna vote for a spaz-head like Kerry, but it's still totally exciting. Plus now getting re-elected this year is another thing we have in common. Sometimes I just can't believe how alike George and I are, like how we're both blokes, and how we're both conservative, and how we're both white, and both Christians... I mean, what Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-1098805927660999032004-10-27T01:09:00.000+10:002004-11-01T18:51:32.283+10:00So this new Indonesian President Bangbang Somethingorother had this party the other week and I didn't get an invitation, but clearly he meant to invite me, so I went anyway, and I was like, "Why didn't I get an invitation?" And he was all, "Oh uhm... it must have er, got lost in the mail.. or uh, maybe Helen Clarke was supposed to tell you about it or... something." So it was clearly just a Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-1097729674218616432004-10-14T13:13:00.000+10:002004-10-14T14:58:23.166+10:00WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! The Coalition is in da house... Parliament House! I am now officially the greatest PM in the history of the universe! I kicked so much arse in the election, and I reckon that I'm just gonna be PM for ever and ever and ever. Even when I'm dead, Australians will elect my corpse over the Australian Loser Party, 'cause they will know that my corpse has a proven track record Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-1097252510889738522004-10-08T22:32:00.000+10:002004-10-09T02:26:15.346+10:00Special Guest Entry by First Lady Janette Howard
Hello there dears, it's Janette here. I know the Australian public do not get to hear me speak much, as I am a lady of few words and I do believe very firmly that a woman's place is in the home and not on a soapbox. However, I thought on this very special occasion of Election Eve that I would break my silence and share my thoughts with Australia.
Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-1096560074942402202004-10-01T01:59:00.000+10:002004-10-02T02:03:33.246+10:00So the ALP think they can beat "Medicare Plus" with "Medicare Gold", but just wait until WE unveil "Medicare II: Electric Boogaloo". That'll learn 'em. And if they try and beat that, then we'll just have to bring out the big guns - "Super Medicare Mega Ultra Pro XP Times Infinity Plus One And No Returns". Let's see Mark Latham ease the squeeze on THAT. Labor's plan is lame anyway. Like, what's Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-1095505320253931462004-09-18T19:55:00.000+10:002004-09-18T21:06:03.410+10:00So now that I'm like, against logging or something, I'm totally green and stuff. Ha, take THAT, Greens. I'm greener than the Greens. I'm so green that if I was sitting in the House of Reps right now, you wouldn't even be able to tell the difference between me and the chairs. I'm so green that I ate ALL my broccoli and silver beat at dinner last night... though that was mainly because Janette saidJohnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-1095009256420059252004-09-13T01:36:00.000+10:002004-09-13T03:14:16.420+10:00Ugh, I had to do that stupid debate with Mark Latham today. I forget how boring politics can be sometimes. Like, in Parliament I only have to get up and speak every so often, and the rest of the time I can just sit back and play snake on my mobile, or draw biro tattoos on my arm or whatever. But one hour of discussing politics without even getting ad breaks? Yawn. Mark kept using all these dorkusJohnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-1093627134339133292004-08-27T23:31:00.000+10:002004-08-30T03:51:16.393+10:00Shut up, Mike Scrafton. Children Overboard is sooo 2001. Like, I tell so many lies, as if I'm supposed to remember the details of just one lie that happened years ago. And now Labor are saying that I've lied 27 times, which is such crap. I've lied way more times than that. I mean, I lie at least once a day, and that's usually just when Alex Downer asks, "Does my bum look big in this?" Credit Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-1091378003369825902004-08-01T21:53:00.000+10:002004-08-02T02:45:22.813+10:00Happy birthday to ME! I'm the birthday boy! Janette says that being 65 also makes me a big boy, but it meant I had a big decision to make. I could stay on as the ruler of Australia, leader of the Liberal Party, and being all powerful and stuff... or I could retire and get a Seniors Card. It was a tough decision to make, 'cause like, senior's meals, cheap movie tickets, and cheap bus fares are Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-1090169503351018952004-07-19T00:59:00.000+10:002004-07-19T03:06:23.616+10:00I'm sooo excited! Alex Downer said the other day that he reckons the War On Terror™ is gonna keep going for at least a generation. That's so rad. Imagine - Coalition Government after Coalition Government, lying and fear-mongering for years to come... even when I retire, it's totally awesome to know that my legacy will live on and on and on. Man, I'm getting all excited just thinking about it! If Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-1088526507567668472004-06-30T00:49:00.000+10:002004-06-30T02:34:51.296+10:00Bloody greedy un-Australian Australians. We do a totally nice, generous, caring thing like pork-barrelling to win votes from poor people by paying them $600 for having kids, and now some people who weren't supposed to receive the bribe did anyway, and they won't give it back. They're being heaps selfish, because we already bribed them with tax-cuts. Man, buying people's votes is HARD. Like, we Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-1086625683628866132004-06-07T23:51:00.000+10:002004-06-08T02:34:19.236+10:00What an awesome week! After meeting with The Terminator, I went to the US captial, George Washington, and hung out with George Bush. It was awesome, 'cause he totally bagged out Mark Latham. I was like, "There's this lame guy at home and he's mean to me and he sucks and is lame." And so George went to this press conference and said, "There's this lame guy in Australia called Mark Latham, and he'sJohnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-1086251981069124152004-06-03T16:58:00.000+10:002004-06-03T18:39:41.070+10:00Oh my God! Oh my GOD! Today I got to meet The Terminator! It turns out that he's also the Governor of California. I told The Terminator how Janette wouldn't let me see T2, 'cause she said it was too violent and would give me bad dreams. But then last year, Alex Downer and I snuck down to Video Ezy and hired it and then told our wives we had to stay late at Parliament, but actually we watched T2 Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-1084287689580228042004-05-11T23:18:00.000+10:002004-05-12T01:01:29.580+10:00Some people are never satisfied. Like, they always whinge if we don't try and stop evil people overseas and stuff, so we go and give the terrorists in Iraq democracy and freedom and all that, and they whinge about THAT. It's not our fault that terrorists hate freedom, you know. And sometimes the only way to get a person to love freedom is by locking them naked and blindfolded in a a room, and Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-1083081639671586652004-04-28T02:00:00.000+10:002004-04-28T02:23:01.310+10:00So not only is Mark Latham a liar liar pants on fire, he's ALSO a copycat from Ballarat. He totally nicked a speech he did from some American president who wasn't George Bush. What a loser. But that's why I own this country - 'cause I come up with my own totally original ideas. Like visiting troops in Iraq on an important day for a rad press stunt. And outlawing gay marriage. I'm a total Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-1081521000029928422004-04-10T00:30:00.000+10:002004-04-10T00:48:25.170+10:00Mark Latham is a total liar liar pants on fire. He reckons that an intelligence agency told him that pulling our troops out of Iraq by December was a good idea. But as if, 'cause intelligence agencies are heaps smart -- intelligent, even -- and as we all know, our troops have to stay in Iraq to get the job done. Smart intelligence agency blokes know that. But 'cause Mark is stupid, he doesn't Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-1080142881613321252004-03-25T01:41:00.000+10:002004-03-25T01:53:16.793+10:00That cop guy, Mick Keelty, is such a dumb idiot. He reckons that Australia is more of a terrorist target 'cause of the war with Iraq, 'cause this place called Spain got bombed, or something. But that's a total der-brain thing to say, 'cause there aren't even any terrorists in Australia. Anyone who paid attention during that Tampa thing would know that terrorists always try to get into Australia Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-1078236498427339152004-03-03T00:08:00.000+10:002004-03-03T00:11:12.170+10:00Isn't anyone else like totally over the whole Iraq thing? It's so 2003. Like trucker caps and Justin Timberlake. But 'cause they're lame and un-hip, some people are still talking about Iraq and saying that I "sexed up" the case for attacking them. As if I did, though. All I said was that things were really getting hot and heavy in Iraq, and that while I knew that war may be long, slow, and hard, Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-1076681072302382832004-02-14T00:04:00.000+10:002004-02-14T00:07:02.280+10:00Mark Latham, Mark Latham, Mark Latham! It's like all anyone cares about any more is Mark bloody Latham. "Mark has a ladder!" "Mark has books!" "Mark, Mark, MARK, MARK, MARK!" So when I decide to change that parliamentary superannuation thingo, of course everyone is all, "Oooh, that was Mark's idea!" Which, of course, it was, but that's hardly the point. Like, I announced it, I had to do stupid Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-1074606223997693742004-01-20T23:43:00.000+10:002004-01-21T00:14:22.606+10:00I'm heaps excited about this "Son of Star Wars" missile thingo. I'm not totally sure what it's all about, but it involves the United States and blowing stuff up, and that's always fun. Of course, the ALP are being lame and trying to ruin all our fun. Mark Latham's trying to pretend he cares about what the Governments spends our money on, but really that's just a front. Yep, Mark's just a big fat Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-1072277621366389242003-12-25T00:53:00.000+10:002003-12-25T02:07:36.513+10:00A Christmas Letter from the Howards
Dear friends, family, and Coalition of the Willing™ members,
When I think back on 2003, one word immediately comes to mind: Democracy. I reckon 2003 was absolutely chockers with democracy. We fully had democracy coming out of our ears. So I'd just like to look back at some of the democratic things that happened this year:
First off, I invented Anti-TerroristJohnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-1070854158813177812003-12-08T13:29:00.000+10:002003-12-08T13:30:19.530+10:00Bonjour from Nigeria! I've had to come here for CHOGM. I hate CHOGM. Robert Mugabe is being so mean to me. He's all, "Oh, you're so racist" But as if. Look at this:
That's the President of Nigeria and he's black. And I'm letting him touch me. If I was racist, I wouldn't let him do that, because he's probably covered in germs and diseases and you can clearly see, he's trying to pick my pockets.Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-1069086583708921382003-11-18T02:29:00.000+10:002003-11-18T02:35:11.796+10:00Ugh, I had to go the UK last week. For real, I reckon that place gets lamer every time I go there. Or maybe it's just Tony Blair who does. Either way, trips there are always totally lame. Especially 'cause it's so weird talking to Tony. Like, I reckon he's a total spaz-wad, and he knows I'm so much cooler than he could even dream of being, so it's always heaps awkward. But we have to pretend to Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-1068385244413441902003-11-09T23:40:00.000+10:002003-11-09T23:51:30.590+10:00Why is Pauline Hanson getting so much attention all of a sudden? She is so 1996. Ok, so like, she got out of prison. Woo hoo. It's not like she's, oh I dunno.... THE BLOODY PRIME MINISTER. Geeze Louise, I run this whole country, and all she does is sit in prison for a few months. As if that's so special or something. I mean, Aboriginals sit in prison all the time. I SIT IN BLOODY PARLIAMENT HOUSEJohnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-1067173098320870052003-10-26T22:58:00.000+10:002003-10-26T22:58:21.653+10:00What a totally wicked week! George's visit is now officially The Greatest Moment in Australia's History Since the Whitlam Dismissal™. And it would've been perfect if that stupid dumb idiot Bob Brown hadn't tried to stuff things up. What a lame-o. George was in Parliament giving this great speech (for real, 'cause like, Parliament is normally soooooo boring when I'm not speaking), and Bob Brown Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-1066833294484878332003-10-23T00:34:00.000+10:002003-10-23T00:42:52.570+10:00OH. MY. GOD. He's almost here! He's almost here! George gets here tonight! I'm soooooo nervous! I mean, we just spent the weekend together at that APEC thing, but now he's coming around to my place! Well... my country. Same thing. Speaking of that APEC summit thingo, that really sucked. Well, it was cool 'cause George was there, but that spaz Dr Mahath..blahsomethingorother who's the PM of some Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-1066320681651612062003-10-17T02:11:00.000+10:002003-10-17T02:11:21.693+10:00Christ, is today "Lefties Have a Whinge" day, or something? First off, all the Uni academics went on strike. Like, I don't really care about Universities not being open, or anything. So a few Arts students will have to stay at home to play hack-sack. Like I give. But I do like Australia to come off as a smart nation. 'Cause like, if the nation looks smart, then I look smart, too, and people are Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-1064732900268801372003-09-28T17:08:00.000+10:002003-09-28T17:24:18.556+10:00Janette is So. Mean. Like yesterday, I wanted to go to the footy grand final, but noooo, I had to go to my daughter's wedding. I mean, of course I would want to go to my daughter's wedding normally, but come on, the footy grand final only comes around once a year. Like Christmas, except instead of Santa, the fat man in a suit is Eddie MaGuire. Anyway, so I went to the wedding, but I brought my Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-1063904897469211492003-09-19T03:08:00.000+10:002003-09-19T15:47:13.613+10:00Simon Crean is such a stupid, der-brain, lame-o, dumb-head, dip-stick, fart-face LOSER. I mean, duh, 'cause he's the leader of the ALP, so of course he is, but now not only is he the leader of the ALP, he's the leader of the ALP and only 16% of the country like him! And I bet that 16% is made up of people who either don't really like him but are just trying to be nice, or stupid, blind, deaf Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-1063040003075420892003-09-09T02:53:00.000+10:002003-09-09T02:53:22.903+10:00Yaaaaaay! George is officially coming to visit me! It's gonna be so cool. Though it sucks a bit that Canberra is so boring and lame. Maybe we can move Parliament to Sydney for the visit, or something. It'd suck if George reckoned that Australian politics was uncool just 'cause Canberra makes everything look lame. Except the ALP, who look lame in any state. Canberra just makes them look like, Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-1061436592934381962003-08-21T13:29:00.000+10:002003-08-21T13:29:52.946+10:00Stupid Wilson Tuckey. What a loser. As a leader, I've tried so hard to set a good example and that, and then he just has to go out and act like a dickhead. Like, how many times does the guy have to see me lie and get away with it to learn what to do when he gets caught out doing something naughty? Children Overboard, Weapons of Mass Destruction, The Govenor General, Ethanol, kicking a footy Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-1060178607630849792003-08-07T00:03:00.000+10:002003-08-07T00:03:27.516+10:00Homosexuals are so bloody greedy. I mean, they already have a parade, and you'd think that'd be enough, but nooooo, now they want to get married too. They have some lame idea that marriage is about love or something. Idiots. Marriage is about sex. Sex that leads to babies. Babies that lead to Young Libs. Anyway, everyone knows that homosexuality is wrong and dumb and evil. 'Cause homosexual Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-1059236544239139982003-07-27T02:22:00.000+10:002003-12-26T01:30:06.860+10:00Happy Birthday to ME! 64 today! Only 36 years till I get a letter from the Queen! Well, ok I get letters from the Liz quite often, but for once I'd like to get one that isn't just whinging about Camilla and Tony Blair.
Janette wouldn't let me have a party this year. Last year, the cabinet all came down to Kirribilli, and we had too much red cordial and Fanta and we decided to play Marco Polo inJohnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-1057931510181931332003-07-11T23:51:00.000+10:002003-07-12T00:36:50.960+10:00Today I met a Palestinian bloke and I was supposed to talk about "road maps" with him. But I'm not really good with maps, 'cause I have a guy that drives me round where I need to be. Apparently this guy was from some place called Israel which is in a place called the Middle East which I think is somewhere in South America. Probably towards the centre of the Eastern part. Anyway, there's this Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-1056980198836793572003-06-30T23:36:00.000+10:002003-06-30T23:40:13.663+10:00I'm so over Telstra. I wish we could just sell the bugger, already. Don't the losers in the bush get it? If we actually wanted to hear anything they have to say, then we'd give them decent phone and internet services. There's a reason we like to keep them disconnected from the rest of Australia. People from the country are so stupid. That's why the National Party are so good, though, 'cause it Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-952870822003-06-05T01:26:00.000+10:002003-06-05T01:26:41.600+10:00It's official: I'm gonna be the PM for ever! Well, unless Labor win an election, but as if. The other night I made Pete Costello and John Anderson come into my office, and I've gone, "Pete, I know you've been working very hard to position yourself as the next leader of the Liberal Party, and you're a top bloke and stuff, but... I'M NOT GONNA RETIRE! HAHA, IN YOUR FACE, DERBRAIN! THINK YOU CAN Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-941102332003-05-11T02:54:00.000+10:002003-12-26T01:30:40.856+10:00Wow, the last week has been so tops! First off, I went to George's ranch is Texas, which was so cool. Well, Texas wasn't cool, 'cause it's pretty hot there. Why is it always so hot in the desert? George reckons it's 'cause there are less buildings to get in the way of the sun. I got to fly there on Air Force One and everyone was all "Ohhh, that's so exciting!" about it, but I don't get what the Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-930538062003-04-23T02:21:00.000+10:002003-04-23T02:21:03.803+10:00For years I've been telling Simon Crean that everyone hates him, only it kind of wasn't true, 'cause there were still a few people who liked him, like the Labor Party and stuff. But now it's actually true! Everyone really does hate Simon Crean. And not just compared to me, either. They even prefer that der-brain Kim Beazley. When even a pack of losers like the ALP think you're a loser, then you Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-925226292003-04-13T20:31:00.000+10:002003-04-14T02:44:38.000+10:00Things are so boring here with this war. I thought it'd be a lot more fun. I mean, the killing and the guns and stuff is all good, but every time the coalition does something stupid (and I'll bet it's always the British troops who muck up, too), the people who advise me on what to do reckon I should stay away from the media. So to pass the time, we're all trying to work out who gets first dibs onJohnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-912187152003-03-23T21:04:00.000+10:002003-03-23T21:04:50.373+10:00It's here! It's finally here! This past week has been tops, I would've done one of these war things much sooner if I'd known how much fun they are. Like, Australian troops go over and kill all the bad people in Iraq so they can have peace, or whatever, and then every time something bad happens to an Aussie, I get to go on TV and be all, "Oh yeah, that sucks, I'm heaps sad about that... Aussie Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-907649002003-03-16T01:58:00.000+10:002003-12-26T01:32:00.293+10:00It's sooooooo unfair! George Bush, Tony Blair and the Prime Minister of Spain (whoever that is) are all going away to some island together, and they didn't invite me! Janette says it's probably just because Australia's not on the Security Council, but I reckon it's because Tony Blair doesn't want me there, because he's a nasty pastie. I mean, they invited the Prime Minister of Spain! Spain's in Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-904603682003-03-11T01:34:00.000+10:002003-03-11T01:34:21.466+10:00I had to spend my weekend hanging in New Zealand, and it was pretty lame. That country's a poor-man's Australia. Like, instead of Aboriginals who steal all the positions in the AFL from real Australians, they have these Ma...mao...mayo... these other foreigners that steal all the rugby jobs. Or like how we have a cricket team, and so do they, only theirs is crap. Or like how Australia has me, andJohnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-894265912003-02-20T21:20:00.000+10:002003-02-20T21:48:38.000+10:00What's all this crap that I keep hearing about the majority of Australians not wanting a War on Iraq? Hello? George Bush said that the Australian people support the War, and I think he'd know what he's talking about, he is like, the President of the World. Well, almost. Just because a few dickhead lefties want to stand around making our streets smell like their unwashed, hippy selves, and whiningJohnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-890300222003-02-13T23:20:00.000+10:002003-02-15T18:41:28.000+10:00Oh Yeah! I'm The Man! Well no, I guess George Bush is The Man, but I'm definitely... a Man. Anyway, George said all this nice stuff about me in the media, like how we're really good mates, and how he thinks I'm tops and really smart, and how he wishes that he could move to Australia so he could see me more often. Well, ok, maybe not that last part, but I'll bet he does. He asked if there was Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-887578262003-02-09T01:43:00.000+10:002003-02-10T00:55:46.000+10:00So I'm about to go on this totally big tour to America to hang out with George and his mates Donald and Colon (Simon Crean laughed at Colon's name, but I don't get it. He's probably just jealous that Colon doesn't want to hang out with him, 'cause he's such a nong. Simon, I mean, not Colon)! It's this heaps big deal, though, like I get a private dinner and a private meeting (and "private" means Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-883287452003-02-01T01:11:00.000+10:002003-02-01T01:12:14.000+10:00You know, sometimes it sucks not being the "Super Power" like George Bush is, but then sometimes it's kind of cool. Like, with this whole war, of course it's heaps cool, but then when people are like, "Uh, dude, it's so not cool!", then I can be all, "Well, it's not me, I'm not commited to it, or anything, but George is, and y'know, he's a mate", but then if they're like, "Oh yeah! Go war! What aJohnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-872600762003-01-11T21:03:00.000+10:002003-01-11T21:03:15.053+10:00Yesterday I took a break from my holidays to have a bit of fun by going back to work. I got to talk about the war all day long, which was totally rad, but 'cause he's such a spaz, Simon Crean was whinging that I "talk up war" too much, or something. As if. I mean, if there's a war coming up, then why can't I talk about war? And he's gotta face the fact that we're going to have a war, 'cause Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-863982102002-12-23T02:02:00.000+10:002002-12-24T23:34:45.000+10:00A Chirstmas Letter from the Howards
Dear Friends, Family and National Party Politicians (Janette said I had to send you a copy of this, even though I didn't want to. No offence),
Wow, I can't believe it's been twelve months since this time last year.
I reckon when I think back on 2002, I'll remember it for all the Muslims, which, as we all know, is just a fancy-schmancy way of saying "Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-861649412002-12-17T23:48:00.000+10:002002-12-17T23:50:03.000+10:00Thursday night sucked so harcore. The senate doesn't want ASIO to be able to hassle Terrorists or something, so we had to sit in Parliament all night while they rejected legislation. It would've been cool, like a sleepover, only it wasn't cool 'cause we weren't supposed to sleep, so it was just an "over". Well, I snuck off to my office to sleep a little, but I woke up with post-its stuck to the Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-856788902002-12-09T00:20:00.000+10:002002-12-09T20:47:39.000+10:00Asia is such a stupid country. It's not like I dropped a bomb on them, or anything, I just said that I probably would if I thought they were going to drop one on us, or if they looked at me funny. They're like, "You better take it back!" And I'm like, "Why don't you take it back?" And they're like, "Take what back?" And I'm like, "Exactly". Ok, so that conversation hasn't exactly happened yet butJohnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-853632542002-12-02T15:35:00.000+10:002002-12-02T15:35:34.976+10:00This weekend really sucked. First Labor won the Victorian State Election, then all the hippies had these big anti-war protests, then everyone's started being really mean to me for saying we should bomb other countries just in case they bomb us, and now the batteries in my Game Boy are flat.
Victorians are so stupid. Their brains have probably been affected by all their bad weather, or somethingJohnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-852440402002-11-29T17:15:00.000+10:002002-11-29T17:19:36.000+10:00Foreigners are so lame for not believing in Santa. Like, don't they watch TV, or something? But apparently now all these childcare centres are gonna "ban" Santa, just so they don't piss off little foreign kids. Probably little foreign Terrorist kids. That'd be right: Terrorists trying to wreck Christmas. But they're not gonna get away with it, 'cause I wrote this letter to Santa:
Dear Santa,
MyJohnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-849100992002-11-22T15:52:00.000+10:002002-11-23T01:22:29.000+10:00I think we have to hate North Koreans now. I hope that doesn't mean we have to stop hating people from Iraq or Afghanistan, though, 'cause I'm having heaps of fun with that. I might call George Bush to see if that's ok. Not that I can't hate people on my own, but it's more fun when we can all gang up on them. Plus, the Americans are always doing fun things like starting wars, bombing countries Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-844558702002-11-13T14:49:00.000+10:002002-11-13T14:50:44.000+10:00Simon Crean has "challenged" me to adopt Labor's stupid lefty policy on war against Iraq. What a lame-o. Does he even get that I'm a Liberal? Why would I want a Labor policy? And it's not like I can't come up with my own policies. 'Cause I can. Like my new policy that everyone has to refer to Simon Crean as "Butt-face" for a whole day. I told him that and he's all, "Yeah? Well I challenge you to Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-839554672002-11-03T22:56:00.000+10:002002-11-03T22:56:26.563+10:00There were all these Terrorists outside Kirribilli today. At first I thought they were ugly, new garden ornaments that Janette had bought, and then I saw them move, and I thought they might be people, but then I realised that they were actually Terrorists. Apparently they were pissed off that ASIO had raided their homes or something. Whatever. If they want their houses left alone, then they Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-836562142002-10-28T21:17:00.000+10:002002-10-28T21:17:59.000+10:00Oh my God! Best. Weekend. EVER.
The APEC summit was soooooo much fun. We played pranks on the leaders of the countries no one cares about (where the hell is Brunei? It's funny, 'cause it sounds like "Brown-eye"!), and had food fights, and at night we told scary stories, like about lefties taking over the world and trying to conserve the environment and stuff (I couldn't get to sleep after that Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-833851662002-10-23T13:08:00.000+10:002002-10-23T13:08:11.990+10:00Ha! Labor lost in Cunningham! And they didn't even lose to a real party. What a bunch of losers. I mean, the Greens are still losers, too, even though they won. We're the only ones who aren't losers, 'cause we were smart enough not to run anyone in an electorate where the people are such losers that they'd vote for losers like the Greens. So the Greens must feel like total losers for winning thatJohnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-828834332002-10-12T23:34:00.000+10:002002-10-17T16:43:08.000+10:00George called me 'cause he reckons that Australia might come under attack from terrorists! He called me! Well, ok so he didn't exactly call me, so much as the Government. And he didn't exactly call, so much as write. And I guess it wasn't actually George who wrote, so much as a member of his staff. But still, it was pretty cool!
So anyway, Daryl Williams reckons that the terrorists would target Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-825903212002-10-06T21:36:00.000+10:002002-11-23T01:25:50.000+10:00The ALP had some lame-o conference and now they think they're top shit. As if. I have to sit through stupid conferences all the time, It's part of my job, or something, and no one ever listens at those things. I always just sit there and write funny things on the table like "Crean has boobies!" with my white-out pen. Sometimes we even play Chinese Whispers. Once we played it in Parliament, and I Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-823052682002-09-30T18:50:00.000+10:002002-09-30T18:50:40.563+10:00That loser Crean reckons that the Government's divided about having a War Levy. We're so not. I told them all today what we're gonna do, and everyone reckons it's a really cool idea. We're gonna have a Sausage Sizzle! It'll be out the front of Parliament House and it'll be totally wicked. Janette gave me this really funny apron that says "Kiss the PM" on it for Christmas, and now I'll get a Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-820936732002-09-25T23:52:00.000+10:002002-09-25T23:54:42.000+10:00Yesterday I had to go visit stupid Tony Blair in his stupid house in his stupid country. He thinks he's so cool, just cause he wrote some stupid "dossier". I'll write my own dossier. It'll be called the "Tony Blair Smells and is a Fart-Face" Dossier, and it'll rock over his.
Anyway, yesterday sucked, 'cause I had to pretend that I like him and he doesn't smell, see:
But in this picture, I'm Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-819959512002-09-24T01:10:00.000+10:002002-09-24T01:10:43.623+10:00Who does Robert Mugabe think he is? I mean, I sent him a perfectly nice invitation to that Commonwealth Meeting today, and he "objected" to it. All it said was:
"hey looozer, evn though we suspended u from the council this year, u can still come 2 our meeting if ure not totally chicken, which I bet u r, coz u smell and we all h8 u. but u can come anywayz".
He must just be totally Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-817537202002-09-18T12:54:00.000+10:002002-09-18T12:54:17.506+10:00Man, that loser Saddam is going to ruin everything! Doesn't he realise that this war is one of the best chances that I've ever had for bonding with George Bush? George is finally paying attention to me. I mean, he called me up. On the phone. And it wasn't to tell me to stop calling him, either. And now Saddam thinks he can just stop this war from happening by letting in weapons inspectors? Not ifJohnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-815506932002-09-13T22:46:00.000+10:002002-09-13T22:46:13.793+10:00I'm so not looking forward to this debate on Iraq. I mean, in public I've been all "hooray democracy!" about it, but honestly, democracy just holds you back. I wish we could just start this war. We can sit around arguing about it till the cows come home, or at least untill I get bored and tell everyone to shut up, but we all knows it's gonna happen, anyway.
Plus it's a really good thing for Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-813565612002-09-10T00:32:00.000+10:002002-09-10T00:32:42.893+10:00He called! He called!!!!!!!!!
George Bush called me on Saturday! On the phone! It was sooo cool! And he said we could join his war! And he called me 'buddy'!
BUT...
He did not invite me to Camp David. And Tony Blair got to go. I'll bet they did heaps of fun camp stuff, too, like canoeing, hiking and arts & crafts. Janette says I can go camping in Australia any time I want, but it's not the Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-811848762002-09-05T22:26:00.000+10:002002-09-05T22:27:54.000+10:00Simon Crean is so mean. He called me a "Lap dog" to the media, which Janette says is not a very nice thing to say about someone, so I called him a "Girly-man", so he called me a "Bum face", so I called him a "Stupid smelly loser, who's such a smelly loser that he doesn't even know he's a smelly loser. But he is.", so he said, "Yeah? Well at least I'm not bald!", so I pulled his hair, but he Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-810333422002-09-03T01:40:00.000+10:002002-09-03T01:40:42.176+10:00Stupid Tony Blair's trying to get us to ratify that stupid Kyoto thing. He's so stupid. I don't know why George Bush hangs out with him, I mean he's the head of the Labor Party for Christ's sake! And I don't know why he cares so much about Greenhouse gases, anyway. I don't even reckon he has a Greenhouse. Plus the weather in England's so crap they could probably do with a bit less ozone above Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-808709172002-08-30T00:42:00.000+10:002002-08-30T00:43:03.000+10:00Everyone is soooo sick of the stupid Democrats. Why don't they just flip a coin? And the 'Gang of Four' think they're top shit, now. At lunch today, they were all wearing red bandanas and I think they've invented their own language or something, cause when I walked past where they were loitering, they yelled, "Yo, J, you aint all dat, be a short-assed fooool, a'ight?" Then they skate-boarded Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-807301262002-08-27T01:00:00.000+10:002002-08-27T01:00:19.863+10:00Happy Tampa Day!
The whole Cabinet came to the Lodge for a party to celebrate a year of offloading our problems onto small, developing countries and islands. Janette made fairy bread and a cake that had a map of Australia on it, and around the edge was an ocean made out of blue jelly, with little marzipan asylum seekers 'floating' in it. I got to eat Tasmania and a little foreign boy. Then we Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-806140062002-08-24T00:20:00.000+10:002002-08-24T00:21:53.000+10:00I went to Adelaide Uni today, but they all picked on me. They said it was 'cause of our policy on asylum seekers and the treatment of higher education, but I know it's just 'cause I'm short. I've been teased about my height my whole life. I even still get teased in Parliament, even though I told Pete Costello that it isn't funny anymore. But the students were even meaner, because they threw Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-805227822002-08-22T00:35:00.000+10:002002-08-22T00:35:12.630+10:00So Natasha's gone. I don't care, I never liked her, anyway. She always teases me and she thinks she's so hot. Once she stuck a 'Kick Me' sign on my back, and no one told me for the whole day. And she's always making fun of my clothes. I could wear Doc Martin's to Parliament, too, only Janette says they're not practical.
Only, I hope Aden Ridgeway doesn't become the Dem's interim leader. This oneJohnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-804229902002-08-19T20:12:00.000+10:002002-08-19T20:12:54.110+10:00Parliament started back today, so Janette bought me a new Powerpuff Girls pencil-case, a new Powerpuff Girls ruler, a new Powerpuff Girls pencil and a new Powerpuff Girls Folder! But she said my old Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles pens still worked, so I couldn't get new Powerpuff Girls ones.
The opposition kept hassling me to say something about Iraq, but I have said something: We wanna go, too! Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-803158432002-08-16T22:28:00.000+10:002002-08-16T22:28:31.720+10:00Guten Tag from Fiji! We're having heaps of fun over here, except everyone's hassling me about this Green House stuff. But I said no way, we're not going to get rid of our green houses. But they reckoned that it was about gas emissions and methane and stuff. I told them that the Labor Party probably generate the most methane and release the most gas in Australia, and I'd be happy to get rid of Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-802697242002-08-15T19:59:00.000+10:002002-08-15T22:34:11.000+10:00I went to Papua New Guinea the other day. I took one look around and said to their PM, Mike Somare, "Man, if this is New Guinea, I'd hate to see Old Guinea!" I don't think he got it. He's pretty dense. When I met him, I said, "Aloha!" And he told me that's from Hawaii, not New Guinea. Hello? I'm the bloody Prime Minister of Australia! I had a quality western education, he probably didn't even go Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-800665652002-08-11T00:46:00.000+10:002002-08-11T00:56:13.000+10:00I'm so cool. I totally talked the Chinese into buying $25 billion worth of gas from Australia. Now everyone in the country must think I'm the shit. I am the shit. I beat Tony Blair and Megaw..something Sukarn..arytpuyo...whatever, the Indonesian woman. Ha! Wonder what George thinks of Tony now! I should remember to invite that Premier Zhu guy round for a beer with George and Queen Liz and not Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-798068672002-08-05T00:59:00.000+10:002002-08-05T00:59:43.110+10:00George still hasn't called. I left a message saying I was willing to bring back conscription if he needed more troops. Sometimes I think he looks down on me. Mainly cause I'm so short. He says he's only joking when he calls me 'Short-ass', though.
Why's everyone so up-in-arms about how much money I earn? I think they just don't realise how hard being a P.M. really is. I mean, Parliament is Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-797361202002-08-03T01:11:00.000+10:002002-08-03T01:13:16.000+10:00The US is gonna attack Iraq and I really, really, really hope George invites us to join! I left a few messages at the White House saying that he could have as many Australian troops as he wanted but he hasn't called back yet. Janette says he's probably just too busy leading the free world, and she's probably right, but he's supposed to be my best friend! He told me that he likes me better than Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3676282.post-796866312002-08-01T23:36:00.000+10:002002-08-01T23:36:11.890+10:00 The UN are soooo unfair. They let the US and China do whatever they want, and we stick a few lip-sewing, children overboard-throwing illegal boat people in detention centres, and suddenly I’m an incarnation of Satan or something. I mean, chill out, it’s not like most of them are ever going to get citizenship or refugee status in this country. Not if I can help it.
But now that bloody Justice Johnnyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11422636376476723955noreply@blogger.com